Category: Tinned Fish

Price: $0.99 at Grocery Outlet

Calories per can: 120

Sodium: 390mg

13g of protein.

Does not require a can opener.

I would like to be upfront with you all. I’ve mindlessly eaten many cans of Polar sardines in Mustard (or as the fans call it,  PSM). But I’ve never taken a good hard look into the can and asked myself, “Is this good?” So let’s dive in.

The box is plain, clear, and the can inside is unmarked and unassuming. I opened the can all the way and sprayed myself with mustard as the lid snapped off. Bad start. There are four sardine filets in what looks like a diluted mustard sauce. The sardines are good lookin’ but a little on the small side. They do not smell hardly at all, like a simple sea brine if anything. I added the can to the rest of my charcuterie plate of flatbread, capers, a garlic mustard sauce, and rootbeer to drink. (see below)

I went in on the ‘dines with just a fork at first. The flavor is very mild, a classic sardine with little to no mustard flavor. It’s not very seasoned, frankly. It is not very salty and I wish the mustard flavor was stronger. This is really a thin yellow ballpark style mustard but I’d prefer something with a bit more bite. Next time I sluppement it with more mustard. Mmmm…

I tend to only eat sardines when no one else is home, and I am not expecting anyone to stop by for several hours. 

I know this is my review but I went online to see what other people were saying about Polar sardines in Mustard. And to my great surprise I found… Nothing. They have no online presence at all. No grocery store carries them, no website sells them. In fact I went to the manufacturer’s website to check it out and there was no mention of them at all. 

Overall I think this can has a good fish texture and is great for the price. It’s pretty low calorie, but if you’re trying to make a meal of it this is not the fish for you. I cannot overlook the poor mustard flavor, if it was stronger I would be able to appreciate this can more. However it does its job as part of a larger plate.

 I will have to give it a 54/100.

Price: $1.79 at Grocery Outlet

Calories per can: 280

Sodium: 100mg

6g of protein.

Does not require a can opener.

This was my first time trying canned oysters, so I was a bit nervous. I knew to expect a different experience than fresh oysters. I prepared a charcuterie board to pair with these, adorned with crackers, habanero pepper cheese, and a dip made with cream cheese, capers, Frank’s red hot sauce, and worsenshire sauce. I will not be trying to correctly spell worsenshire sauce, sorry. 

Once my board was prepared, I decided to dive in head first and try one of the oysters plain. It wasn’t especially chewy or muscley, but instead just rather mushy. The smoked flavor was apparent but not overbearing. The salt levels were satisfactory. The flavor was pleasant, but the texture was off-putting. I tried it along with a cracker, coated in my beautiful cream cheese concoction. Here is where it really shined, because the crunchy nature of the cracker outshined the lackluster texture of the oyster, and the oyster seemed to unify seamlessly with the dip to create a pleasant celebration on my taste buds. 

Next, I was excited to dig into the vegetables that were also included in the tin. I didn’t pick up on the taste of them in the oysters very much, but thought the vegetables were likely to have a complex and rich flavor profile after having been sat alongside the oysters. I saw a few carrots and red peppers, and decided to go for a carrot first. To my dismay, when I took a bite, it turned to mush almost instantaneously in my mouth. The flavor was akin to a mixture of oil and fish fat. There seemed to be no salt on the carrot somehow, despite the saltiness of the oysters. I didn’t partake in the other vegetables in the tin after that lackluster experience. 

Upon reading other reviews for this can online, I found mixed opinions. I know this is supposed to be my review, but to quote Tralania H, “1/5 stars. 

So much sand

Depending on the quality, most times I find sand in the can, just a little and not too much to complain about. The can I had this go around actually made me stop what I was doing and come running to the internet. The oysters themselves were so mushy and gritty at the same time. The vegetables in the can felt like they were there just to mask the off flavor of the oysters. This product missed the mark, especially in comparison with some of the other smoked products. I’m certain someone has a job within the company for quality assurance and control. This experience left me feeling like the person with that job stole money from me. Standards have to at least match the strong company name.”

Overall, I would give this tin a 3/10. I would not eat this tin on its own, due to the terrible texture, but utilized in a dip or a dish these oysters get the job done.